


beautiful reminders of humanity

by ssaseaprince



Category: Hannibal (TV), Hannibal Lecter Series - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Arguing, Crying, Domestic Fluff, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Hannibal Lecter Loves Will Graham, Hannibal Lecter is a Softie, Hannibal just wants to help, His encephalitis is recurrent, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Post-Episode: s03e13 The Wrath of the Lamb, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Will Graham Has Encephalitis, Will Graham Loves Hannibal Lecter, Will still has trouble trusting him though sometimes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-07
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-12 23:27:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,959
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29892156
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ssaseaprince/pseuds/ssaseaprince
Summary: Request I got from TumblrPrompt: Will flinches away from Hannibal during an argument (angst & hurt/comfort)After the fall, Will and Hannibal settle down in Greece. They live a blend of domesticity and hunting, and things are peaceful (well, their kind of peaceful). Things can't stay perfect forever though, and Will ends up coming down with encephalitis again. Struggling with memories of the past and worries about the future, he hides it from Hannibal. When Hannibal does eventually find out, it leads to an argument about trust, honesty, and asking for help.ft. a collage of every time Hannibal has cried for Will
Relationships: Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter
Comments: 5
Kudos: 103





	beautiful reminders of humanity

The first couple months after the fall had been rough, physically, having to go into hiding while their bodies were on mend. Hannibal's wounds, gruesome as they were, healed relatively quickly and without much fuss. Will on the other hand, had almost died. He had taken a stab to the shoulder, which shouldn’t have been the problem that it was, except that it got infected. He was stuck on the brink of death for quite a long time, and then spent the month after he was stabilized in and out of consciousness, high on painkillers. Hannibal had always been good at working and functioning under pressure, which was good because if he hadn’t been they probably would have died. The first time Will had come to full consciousness, however, Hannibal was a wreck. He’d cried then. Not a soft trickle of a few tears, but gut-wrenching sobs full of shaking shoulders and an ocean full of tears. Will cherished that memory, as he did with every memory of Hannibal crying. They made him human, seem more touchable. The first time he had cried in front of Will, they had been standing on the cliff right before they fell, and the next time was when Will had first woken up. He cried when Will spoke for the first time too, so long after the fall. The first time they made love, Will’s neck was wet with his tears. When Will said “I love you” the first time. 

Will never took Hannibal as someone who cried very often, and he never had been. That was until the fall, until Will. The fall had been a rebirth for both of them, it didn’t only symbolize Will’s becoming. And then Will had gotten sick and Hannibal had almost lost him, and Hannibal was again reminded how precious life really is, and how easy it would be to lose him. They both made it through, but all the walls and forts between them had crumbled, and they were left exposed to each other. There wasn’t any reasoning or any point in trying to put them back up, because by then their souls were permanently intertwined. Will could read him no matter what anyways, so things like silence and shouting were equally expressive. Hannibal still didn’t cry a lot by any means, but he did cry (genuinely, cry) now on occasion, whereas he hadn’t really ever before. 

They didn’t fight much. Of course they got on each other's nerves at times and had tendencies to snap at one another when they were irritated, but actual full blow fighting and arguing was extremely rare. 

Today wasn’t like that though.

It was about two years after the fall, and they had finally settled down in Lakonia, an administrative region of Greece that’s in the southeastern part of the Peloponnese peninsula. They’d eventually been officially declared dead, and the last year and a half had been good. Both were more than content to let the past mostly stay where it was and move forward, and their days blended together in a mix of hunting and domesticity. They’ve been happy, but they out of anyone should know how easily the calm can be shattered. 

It started like it had before. Sleepwalking, gradual hallucinations, losing small bits of time. Will knew what it was, but he avoided telling Hannibal about it. He supposes he was scared, scared to lose the peaceful (peaceful in their own way) domesticity they had settled into. Scared of how it would affect their relationship. Hannibal had changed a lot since the fall and since his time in prison, and Will knew logically he didn’t need to worry. But the nightmares were full of flashbacks to ticking lights and needles, and he grew more and more distant, and Hannibal’s concerned eyes followed him everywhere.

It shouldn’t have taken him as long as it had to realize it, so when he finally did Hannibal was disgusted with himself. Will had been deliberately hiding it from him, but still, he felt he should’ve noticed sooner. Anti-NMDAR Encephalitis was known to be recurrent. It was extremely important that Will got treatment as soon as possible, especially since he had gone so long without it last time. The only option Hannibal had was to confront him.

That all led up to now. Their first real fight since the fall.

“Your health is of the utmost importance Will, you cannot be keeping things like this from me.” Frustration leaking into his tone, Hannibal leaned against the kitchen counter. Will was sitting across from him on a barstool, nursing a glass of whiskey. Will was annoyed, he knew he shouldn't be annoyed but he was. He knew Hannibal was just concerned, but it felt overwhelming, and he couldn’t help but wonder how genuine the concern was. The past couple of weeks he found himself falling back into old thinking patterns, reminiscing about the past. He knew the Hannibal in front of him was completely different then the Hannibal he had first met, but he couldn’t help but to compare his abundance of concern now to the great lack of care he had before.  
He grimaced, “Well I don’t need you freaking out. I can take care of myself, always have.”  
“For the most part, yes, you can. But you aren’t doing a good show it right now, Encephalitis is life threatening if left untreated, you are aware of that. You cannot just ignore it.” Hannibal’s usual calm façade was slowly slipping. “With everything you've been through, you’re honestly willing to die by a treatable disease? You’re not stupid, Will.”  
Taking another drink of his whiskey, he rolled his eyes. The alcohol was making his thoughts fuzzy, but goddamnit was he too sober for this.  
“I wasn’t going to let it go on forever Hannibal, you’re right, I’m not that fucking stupid. You’re just overreacting and being dramatic, like always.” He raised his glass to take another drink only to have it roughly pulled from his grasp.  
Looking up, he glared at the man across from him. “What the fuck Hannibal?”  
Hannibal's calm was practically nonexistent at this point, and he slammed the glass down on the other side of the counter before looking back at Will. “Are you so insistent on being self destructive? You’re acting like a child Will, refusing help.”  
Will let out a loud, overexaggerated sigh. His voice was rough when he spoke, the tone of it slowly rising. “Well what am I supposed to do? It’s not like I can just walk into a hospital and ask them to help me treat a rare disease that I’m known for having had before. Maybe I’ve just been trying to figure out what to do, I’m not completely incompetent you know.”  
Hannibal’s clenched fists rested on the counter. “You could ask for help! We could get the right supplies and treat you, without needing to go to the hospital. You know that, you are just being unnecessarily difficult.”  
Will stood, the stool pushed behind him as he glared at Hannibal. “Yeah well maybe I don’t want your help, you don’t exactly have the best track record of making good medical decisions for me.”  
Hannibal’s next words came out in a raised voice, not exactly a yell, but they seemed to take up all the air from the room. “I am not going to stay here and watch you kill yourself. I’d thought better of you Will, but if that’s how you chose to act I am not going to stay here for it.”

And Will flinched.

The small, unconscious action sent Hannibal reeling, as he looked back over what he had just said. He didn’t think of himself as an impulsive person, he didn’t think he was the kind of person who said things they didn’t mean out of anger, but Will seemed to bring that out in him. He and Will were so far beyond lies and manipulation, they were rarely things that were worried about within their current relationship. But watching Will so blatantly refuse to take care of himself, putting himself in danger by refusing help, was unbearable. So he threw out the first thing he thought of to get Will’s attention, for him to realize just how serious he was. He’d never leave him, they’d consummated their marriage in the depths of the ocean, and an infinite amount of times over since then. 

It took him a minute to grasp what he had even said as he stared at Will across the kitchen. It was such a preposterous thing to think, let alone say that it took him a moment to understand the words had actually come out of his mouth. Will had frozen up, and Hannibal could almost see the walls being thrown up and forts being built, and it sent a pang of icy dread through his heart. 

“I’m not refusing treatment, I just needed time to get used to the idea of you helping me, since you’re the reason I almost died last time. And here I was feeling bad because I was thinking you’re not like that anymore.” Will wasn’t glaring at him anymore, but his body language was rigid and the words he spoke were flat. “If you’re going to leave, just leave Hannibal, you don't need to find excuses to. You can cut the act.”  
“Will.. “ The words seemed stuck in his throat as he said them. “I didn’t mean that.”  
‘No, just go. If you think so low of me then just leave. Don’t want you feeling obligated to take care of me, since ya know, I obviously can’t take care of myself.” And with that, Will turned to leave, grabbing his keys and starting to put on his coat. He wasn’t full on drunk, but tipsy enough that he swayed slightly when he walked.  
“Will, you don’t have to go.” Hannibal grabbed his arm gently, turning him to look at him. “You’re too intoxicated to drive right now.”  
Will shook his head and roughly pulled his arm away. He needed to be alone and it irritated him that Hannibal was telling him what to do, but he had to accept his logic. And driving after he'd been drinking wouldn't fare well in the argument that he could take care of himself. “Fine, then you can get the fuck out.”  
“Will…” Hannibal’s voice was soft, “I didn’t mean it.”  
“I don’t care, just get out. At the very least just give me some space.”  
Hannibal didn’t want Will to feel more pushed, but he had to add, “alright, but don’t drink anymore. It will worsen your condition. Please, Will.”  
Will sighed, rubbing a hand over his face. “Yeah, whatever. Just go.”  
Hannibal nodded and stepped away, he got his own coat and pulled the front door open. Hesitating, he turned back and looked at Will, who was staring at the floor. “Please be safe.” Will just waved his arm indicating that he should go, and with that, Hannibal stepped out onto the porch and then closed the door. 

Will was exhausted, his head was throbbing and his eyes stung. With Hannibal gone, the tears finally began to steadily fall from his eyes. After a while of standing there, staring at the front door, he ended up stripping down to his boxers and laying down in their bed. Penelope, their little King Charles Spaniel puppy, watched him from the doorway. A few minutes later, she was picked up and snuggled in Will’s arms on the bed. Hannibal hadn’t wanted a dog, but he accepted that living with Will meant they were bound to get one. He tried to be apathetic towards her when Will first brought her home, a scrawny little stay, but the affection in his eyes was unmistakable. The little dog followed him everywhere now, and they ended up bonding very quickly. Will had even joked that Hannibal liked Penelope more than him. As he held her and pressed his face against her fur, Will thought back on those memories fondly.  
His mind palace was nowhere near as vast or intricate as Hannibal’s, but he still had memories there that he clung to. Closing his eyes, Will went back to the ones he cherished the most. 

The tears that had clung to Hannibal’s lashes, barely visible in the dark of the night after they killed the dragon. 

The sobs that came from Hannibal’s lips when Will had first woken up. 

The few drops that fell from his eyes when Will had spoken to him for the first time in his recovery. 

The little gasps of breath that had accompanied the multitude of fallen tears that came the first time they made love (calling it anything else wouldn’t encompass it enough).

When Will had said “I love you” to him the first time and silent rivers had run down his cheeks as he’d smiled so vibrantly it was hard to look at. 

He knew Hannibal hadn’t meant it, that he was just frustrated and fed up and worried. They wouldn’t survive separation, and Hannibal needed Will just as much as Will needed Hannibal, they needed each other to live. He knew Hannibal loved him, his love was as real and tangible as those tears he’d cried.  
Will loved their lives, and he didn’t want anything to cause a rift in that. He trusted Hannibal and he knew he would take care of him and help him to the best of his abilities. But to see his concern in comparison to the first time he got sick, was jarring, and Will almost didn’t know how to handle it. Hannibal had turned himself in and spent three years in jail for Will, and he was sure if he decided he wanted to go to the hospital to get treated, even if it risked exposing them, Hannibal would take him in a heartbeat. It shouldn’t be, but the depth of Hannibal’s affection for him was still surprising at times.  
Will acknowledged that being worried about Hannibal’s reactions to him being sick was justified, and that there would probably always be times where the trust between them wavered because of the past, but he knew Hannibal wouldn’t ever leave.  
He’d call Hannibal in the morning he decided, give them both time to calm down. And with that last thought, he tried to sleep for the night.

When the sun came up, Will was thankful. He’d spent the night tossing and turning, fighting off nightmares when he did manage to sleep. More than once he found himself reaching out to the other side of the bed for Hannibal, only to find that he wasn't there. Getting up, Will put on a simple plain shirt and pair of sweatpants and went to make coffee. Their coffee maker had been outrageously expensive, but Hannibal had insisted on it, and it ended up being worth it. Now, looking at the stupidly expensive coffee maker brought Will a strong feeling of longing. Hannibal had only been gone a night and Will felt like he was already falling apart. Calling Penelope to come with him, Will picked up his phone and decided to sit on the porch to call Hannibal, deciding that the fresh air would do him some good. He wasn’t sure what he was going to say, but he just needed him back. 

Will wasn’t someone who was very jumpy at all, but when he opened the front door and turned to see Hannibal sitting with his back against the house, Will startled so badly he almost dropped his phone. 

Hannibal turned at the sound of the door opening and looked up at Will with puffy eyes and red cheeks dried with tears. Internally, Will sighed. He looked like he’d been there all night. Wordlessly, Will reached down and pulled Hannibal to his feet and then brought them both inside. He helped Hannibal get off his coat and then stripped them both down to their boxers, before pulling them in their room and into bed. They curled up around each other, Will’s face pressed against Hannibal's chest and Hannibal's arms around him, running his fingers through Will’s hair. They laid in silence together for a while, just counting each other's breaths and heartbeats.  
Eventually, Hannibal broke the silence, his voice raspy and quiet. “I’m sorry.”  
Will took a breath before answering.  
“I’m sorry too.”  
Pressing his face into Will’s curls, Hannibal's breathing hitched. “I wouldn’t ever leave you, not again.”  
“I know Hannibal,” Will responded. He pulled back a little so they were looking at each other. Hannibal’s eyes were wet with tears as he looked back at him.  
Leaning forward, Will kissed away the few droplets of water that had escaped.  
“I was going to tell you, I just needed to work up to it.’  
Hannibal was silent for a moment before he replied. “I understand your hesitation. If you wish to go to the hospital and be treated there, we can go. There would be a risk, but we can make it work if that is what you want.”  
Will shook his head. “I want you to treat me. I just needed to get out of my head.” He smiled at the terrible pun, watching to see if Hannibal would react.  
He didn’t, continuing to stare at Will mutely.  
Will sighed, again. “Help me, Hannibal. Please?”  
Hannibal nodded at that, pressing his forehead against Will’s, wet cheeks brushing against dry ones.  
“Of course beloved. Anything you want.”  
Will filed away the memory into his memory palace, and placed it with all of the other times Hannibal had cried for him. Beautiful reminders of his humanity.  
“I love you, Hannibal.”  
“I love you too Will, always.”

**Author's Note:**

> I apologize for the ooc, but I really adore lovesick Hannibal.


End file.
